gonna be emo kid today .. sigh ..
i dont know why but sheena random told me this that day " gina let go la , let it be fwen nth else " .. actually easier said than done la . it's killing me also .. you all think i dont wanna ? it's really hard for me to hide my emotion always .. still laughing and playing as if nothing had happened . i am human also in case you all forgot .. i m not as weak as u all thought , but definitely not as strong as u all see .. but one good thing is , i wont let these negatives thoughts haunt me for too long .. i know how it feels like when my world was once black and white for one whole solid year .. when life is at risk , every now and then .. special care needed this and that .. those toughest time alr had past .. so this is definitely nothing .. looking back now ; i do have alot ppl i know indeed , alot ppl know me also .. but the sad thing bout it is i dont have ppl i fully trust and consult in everything and i mean every single little thing .. i used to have one very very very close fwen .. she know almost everything .. we share soooooo many thing tgt .. but nt now anymore .. we are fren back now alr , but still , we know things wont be like in e past .. trying so hard to help ppl back on track , ask them think positively those .. everything is draining away whatever i have .. i am tired .. i feel like really blocking off everyone .. i did it once .. meaning if i really wanna i can do it again .. but i dont want to .. i dont wanna waste my life living in my own world .. it's really tiring .. my bottle is alr 3/4 full .. i dont know when it'll explode / overflow .. when i hide and cry who knows ? when i still trying to hold on , who is willing to lend me a helping hand ? forget it . i give up . on ppl . i wont trust anyone . i can only rely on myself .. only myself ! bye .